Wedding Planning For Kenya from Abroad - Part 1

Planning a wedding is a headache. Planning a wedding locally is a headache. Planning a wedding in a different continent is a massive, gigantic,head-banging type migraine. The list of things that have to go right is quite daunting. For baby girl and I, for a wedding scheduled this coming December, we have had curious surprises, the usual odd ball and had to dodge curveballs thrown our way like any other couple planning a wedding. To say the least, we have learnt a lot about ourselves, and more importantly, event planning and management as a whole. The biggest thing we ever had to plan between herself and I was our engagement party - and that comprised no more than 50 closest friends from all over the US. Weddings are quite daunting and rightfully so. To understand our challenges so far you also have to consider the backdrop against which we are planning this wedding.

DECEMBER 2007

Firstly, a lot of people, fearing pre and post-electoral violence last year chose to hold off on trips, vacations and weddings this past December. Post electoral violence and intermittent civil unrest throughout January, February and March 2008 had a devastating effect on the Kenyan tourism industry. This meant, a lot of re-scheduling not only vacationers and business travelers but also university exchange programs, peace corps etc. This has congested the tourism schedule considerably for 2008 which means this coming December, despite rising gas prices, we will see an incredible upsurge in diaspora-tourism as opposed to previous years. This means increased competition not just locally (in Kenya) but also from abroad.

ECONOMY ON THE BRINK

Secondly, the fact that the dollar is weak largely due to the US economy tittering on the brink of (or already in) a recession has meant not only a surge in gas prices but also commodity prices. This means it will not only cost us more to travel to Kenya but it has increased our commodity expenses significantly. The Kenyan Shilling (Ksh) has gained considerably against the US dollar recently. As we speak, our estimations are that our best exchange rate among different banks, forex bureaus and other institutions in Kenya is hovering between Kshs 60 - 63 against the dollar. Consider this against the dollar trading at about Kshs 70-73 this same time period a year ago.

WHO IS YOUR COMPETITION

Thirdly if you are planning a wedding in Kenya in late December you’re not just competing with fellow couples for venues but also with businesses and corporations holding their end of year parties. This also means, more competition for good DJ’s, caterers, flower vendors, car leasing services, decorators, bakers - the whole nine. In addition, keep in mind the major holidays in December - Jamhuri Day (Independence Day) on the 12th,Christmas eve and Christmas Day on the 24 and 25th respectively, New Year’s Day on the 31st and January 1st. You have to schedule your day somehow to make sure it’s not right before or right after these days. This allows flexibility for travel options for your guests and also means a little bit more availability from vendors whom you are depending on to make things right.

CUSTOMS

I had never thought our customs would have such a big impact on our planning. I knew we wanted to incorporate them to as much an extent as possible without making ours a typical traditional wedding. I have come to note that Kenyans turn such gatherings into mini-political rallies for family members with political aspirations. Weddings/Graduations provide a familiar and captive audience, and being a Kenyan, I know the odd political discussion is always around the corner. In our custom, the groom’s family performs all the wedding planning. The responsibility of the bride’s family is reduced to choosing the church. That meant, for us, at least modifying some aspects of it. We decided against a church wedding for one big reason; logistics. But before we get into that, let me address customs exhaustively.

Our customs create a rift in the planning process. We opted against a pre-wedding since, for our sake our wedding will be in Kenya. It would be disingenuous of us to hold one in the states and have the wedding in Kenya. Pre-weddings traditionally were meant to raise money for the wedding and it was/is expected that all invitees and contributors will be guests at your wedding. This benevolent custom has been abused so much so that not only will baby girl and I not hold one, we generally do not attend pre-weddings. We substituted this with a committee of our closest and dearest, and assigned certain costs to each individual with baby girl and I assuming 90% of the cost.

Secondly, weddings are planned and executed by committees in our customs. Again, I personally do not care for committees so in the interest of simplicity and not to do away with this custom, we formed two committees. One largely symbolic - that has uncles, aunts etc - which will do the ‘negotiating for the bride’ and oversee other tradition-related aspects of wedding should they arise. The other is a smaller 4 person committee, baby girl, myself, my sister and my mom who has run our Kenya operation superbly. This acts as more of a finance committee which has made our decision making process pretty simple and highly effective. Simply put, it avoids bottlenecks in decision making by large committees and has handled the more important aspects of the ceremony such as choosing vendors, venues, caterers, colors, decorations etc and engaging with a myriad of vendors which is basically the brunt of the work that needs to be done.

Thirdly, as briefly mentioned above the bride’s family is not involved in the planning process. As such it is difficult for me to ask my in-laws their opinions/likes/dislikes etc. Baby girl’s parents are cosmopolitan in some ways but traditional custom-wise for most part. As such, they have relinquished planning to us and let us run with it. It would help to have their input which baby girl solicits once in a while but for most part they seem to be happy with our operations.

I will talk about our plan and execution here soon. Until then the journey continues….

Initiatives for Change

I sat in on a discussion last night amongst Kenyans in my community trying to make a positive contribution to help alleviate the situation in our country right now. Beyond prayers and decrying the tribalism evidenced at home at previous meetings, there was also a deep sense of purpose. The idea was to champion a cause under the banner of ‘A Tribe Called Kenya’ whose purpose is pretty self-explanatory if you ask me. The consensus was that negativity will flourish unless concerted voices of reason do something, and that something be done quickly. I am heading to San Diego this week for the rugby tournament and will attempt to chronicle the events as they unfold. I have been there once and blogged about my experience here, I imagine, the camaraderie will be even more so heightened by the situation in the country. Various initiatives are being brought to light as a result:

VUMA Kenya – An initiative by young professionals and well wishers to assist the disaster efforts of established disaster relief agencies by raising funds.

One Nation One Party – Initiative in conjunction with Virgin Atlantic and Capital FM to raise money for the Sadili Kibera Kids and Kenya Redcross at this year’s USA Sevens Rugby Tournament in San Diego

Additionally, appeals are out for folks in the Dallas, Fort Worth (Texas) areas for any clothes (new and/or used) to be donated to IDP camps in Kenya. Anyone in this area willing to donate can contact me via my contact page or email MagaidiAfrika[at]Yahoo.com

On another note: good take (IMHO) by the LA Times in their editorial of the situation in Kenya, the killing of legislator Mugabe Were and what it portends for democracy in Kenya

Opening Day

So summer is over - who cares? Football season is here. Been out and about for awhile, got caught up in projects and work but I can’t complain. Regular posting resumes soon. Got some great tracks to share too, see below for a clip of what good music is.

RIP Lady S. We love you girl

KQ 507

My heart goes out to the families of those involved in the KQ507 tragedy. This tragedy hits home for me in more ways than one. My cousin who works as a flight attendant for Kenya Airways was scheduled to be on this flight and changed his schedule the last minute in order to help crew on a different Kenya Airways flight at Abidjan. The unease and tension revoked memories of the wait for news of family members aboard KQ431 which crashed in 2000. Sadly we still lost friends and acquaintances in this tragedy. We can only offer prayers and support to their families. I cannot imagine the sense of loss and despair the family members have been subject to over the last few days and can only hope and pray that they find the strength to cope during this difficult time.

Show your support for the friends and family of KQ507 here


Where is the Value?

LAX airport is a business traveler’s worst nightmare. While we jet in, we are flying alongside couples heading to Hawaii and the sunny beaches of California for vacation. How I wish.  I am sitted next to a burly gentleman headed to Melbourne, Australia. It is Tuesday evening and he’ll get to Melbourne on Thursday. My plan is to get the rental, grab a bite, get to bed and get up early the next day.  I have a one O’clock appointment then head back out East, with my luck I can get there early, do my thing and head back out, catch the 12:15 or 1:50 flight back.

 

 I was once seated next to a retired 4 star army general who, upon finding out my interest in Music talked to me about starting my own recording studio the whole time we were on a flight to Ohio. He was stern in his delivery, yet soft spoken, almost whispering but very interesting. It was easy to see the charisma in this man. He scribbled outlines of a business plan as he spoke, meticulously going over point by point, even sketching a design of a recording studio. He spoke about guiding the team behind Two Fish Studios in Minnesota, in the realization of their dream - just one amongst his many business conquests. I believed him. I still have those scribbles from the plane on the cover of an American Way magazine. I’ll put them to good use sir.

 

This time to LA, I spent a great deal of time buried in my paperwork.  A presentation, uneblievably detailed prose on proposed standards for publicly traded companies on disclosures and internal control frameworks, and a book I can’t seem to put down called The Tipping Point. Business is conducted the next day, the ride to downtown Los Angeles, is excruciating. Heading down 110 north, I’m stuck in one of those pointless backups. I could never live in LA, there is nothing glamorous about this City, I can’t wait to get out. I suggested that if you took Hollywood out of California then all you’d have is an older version of Nebraska only more spread out.

 

Business meeting blah blah blah, sign here, date there - we’ll be in touch, i’m headed back to LAX. I’m done early. I won’t make the 12:15 flight but i’ll catch the 1:50 one out. There is an offer to upgrade to first class at an additional $135 for the journey, I don’t think that would be approved on my expense report. American Airlines has a large operation here, there are groups headed to Tokyo, Pakistan, Miami, Santiago Chile, Hawaii and virtually every city in South America. I’m stuck in line behind a contingent of a christian ministry group based in Colorado and a group of evangelists from North Dakota trying to catch the flight to a retreat in Oahu. The amount of luggage? My goodness!

 

I don’t see why, in this era of modern technology, and conveyor belts, I should be asked to haul my suitcase all the way to the other side of the terminal for X-Ray, then head back the to the other side to be screened. LAX needs to style up. What about those people to Oahu? Will you have them drag their 40 odd pieces of luggage, do you see how old they are? Where is your mother? Ok ok.. no need to go there. I grab a bite at a burger King next to gate 48. The irony I could not ignore - a poster right outside it reads - Grab a value meal (chicken sandwich, fries and a soda) - $9:48, Where is the value in that or am I missing something?

 

 

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